Monday, August 27, 2012

10 Best Decisions of our Married Life... #6 Reach Consensus or Linda Submits

Recently I began to share something I composed some years ago to be part of a document for a niece as she got married in June 2004.  That document was created as a compilation of entries under the title:  
The Wisdom of the most important women in your life.  
Each woman who submitted an entry chose her own subject matter.  I promised to post my entry on this blog.  This is the sixth of our top decisions in the list of:
The Top Ten Decisions Guiding Our Married Life
By Uncle John and Aunt Linda Worden
6.We will make all major decisions together and seek to reach consensus. We will not proceed in any area on anything unless both of us are at peace and in agreement. But if an irreconcilable difference occurs on a matter needing an immediate decision, Linda will submit to John’s leadership.
Ephesians 5: 21-23 Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.  Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord.  For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior.  This is not difficult for us.  Uncle John is a very loving husband who gives me much support and freedom.  It is easy for me to be willing to submit to him - I almost never have to.  But there was one time when we faced an issue with a difference of opinion.  We were moving to Texas.  I really wanted to buy a house and not move into a rent home.  We looked for a house and decided to make an offer to purchase.  Our offer was turned down and since our home in Wisconsin had not yet sold, we decided not to counter offer but instead to rent a house.  The day before we drove away from Wisconsin, our realtor called to say the seller of the home we’d made an offer on had decided they would accept our offer after all.  I was just sure this was God’s will for us and I was so eager to buy instead of rent.  John, however, did not have peace about the decision and said he didn’t want to own two houses at a time.  As hard as it was for me to do, I knew I needed to submit to his will and move into a rent house.  It took six months for our house to sell but five years before we bought another home.  In looking back, it was definitely the right thing to do.  I am so glad we didn’t buy the house we had made an offer on.  It needed work and it would have been far too expensive for us if we had bought it.  Interest rates were dropping and in five years we had become acquainted with our city and remain very pleased with the home we own now.  We have absolutely no regrets for having followed this decision throughout our lives.  Having peace in decisions is a way to be protected from mistakes.
Update in August 2012:

We continue to practice this decision with a 46 year track record.  We know each other pretty well.  We do not face issues that can't be decided amicably.  We are together on decisions and neither of us experiences frustrations over actions or ideas of the other.  We are blessed.

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